Best Christmas ever – a peaceful birth under the xmas tree!

Using hypnosis for pain management
Using hypnosis to anesthetize arm

With Christmas around the corner, I thought I would focus on lovely Christmas birth stories.  Here George tells of her journey using and developing her Natal Hypnotherapy skills to help her have the best Christmas ever! After listening to the Natal Hypnotherapy tracks and attending a weekend course, she wrote her own script to really personalise her birth preparation.

“Having used hypnotherapy and self-hypnosis for a number of years and experienced the sometimes life-changing results (including sticking a nappy pin through my arm!), it wasn’t a question of if I would use it during my pregnancy and the birth of Danuta, but rather how I could use it.  Not only had I never given birth before but we also had our hearts set on a home birth, which if we were to listen too carefully to conventional current medical opinion, was a crazy plan fraught with issues – what if it goes wrong?  You will only have gas and air – what if you need an epidural/c-section – think about the transfer times to hospital – you don’t know your own body, being a first-timer – you are putting yourself and your baby at great risk – what you are considering is very selfish.  All of these words had come from my doctor and pretty much every mainstream birthing text-book backed her up.  Any basic birthing instinct to bring your baby into this world in a safe, comfortable and loving environment is dangerous and selfish.  And she’s a doctor, so she must be right…

In my experience, a Natal Hypnotherapy approach turns the whole what-if-it-goes-wrong starting point on its head and focuses instead on the perfect and unique birthing experience for the individual woman or couple.  If you dare to allow yourself to visualise it, what factors would feature in your perfect birthing experience?  For me, Christmas is a very special time of year that holds with it feelings of childhood excitement and happiness – just the smell of a mince-pie or the sound of carols being sung makes me glow inside, so the fact that our baby was due around this time had all the makings of the best Christmas ever.

Throughout my pregnancy I had spent time listening to a Natal hypnotherapy relaxation tracks (you can get a free download by clicking here) which, whilst increasing my bond with our growing baby inside, also helped me tune into my natural instincts as a mother-to-be.  In the third trimester Adam and I attended a Natal Hypnotherapy weekend and this is when we really began to focus our minds on the actual birth and the writing of our own birthing programme.  Using emotive language that was very specific to our own personalities we developed a script that described the perfect birthing experience – how we would feel, how we would react to certain phases or situations, images, sounds and smells that would trigger positive emotional responses.  For example:

The sounds of the music, which are now familiar to me, reinforce my natural feelings of relaxation and calm, allowing me to fall deeper and deeper into a comfortable, peaceful feeling of complete relaxation…

an extract from the birthing programme – earlier stages of labour

…with each contraction I visualise my cervix softening and opening slowly softening and opening gently, smoothly and easily…

george adam and danuta after birth
The best Christmas ever

an extract from the birthing programme – final stages of labour

I would read the birthing programme often, really soaking up the words that meant so much to us and once in a relaxed state of self-hypnosis I would then recall these words, images and feelings to the sounds of music that would accompany us in the birthing experience.  The more often I listened, the deeper into my subconscious these associations were going.  The Christmas tree bauble I knew so well, the stocking hung by the fireplace ready for baby’s presents, the smell of Christmas spices – all of these factors meant excitement, comfort, happiness and deeper and deeper confidence to birth our baby safely and naturally.

The due date came and went and as the days ticked by, talk was turning to induction – this is when I felt my most sacred.  Not because of the dangers of letting me go over, but because I just felt baby wasn’t ready yet and that he or she would decide when it was time to meet us.  Things were happening – we’d had a show and, having had contractions for 2 weeks now, I was already 3 cms dilated.  14 days after her official due date and on the day we were due to go into hospital, baby Danuta decided it was time to join us and she wasn’t hanging about either.

George and Danuta
George and Danuta

The experience certainly wasn’t without pain and there was no time for birthing music CDs or Christmas spice oils, but I wouldn’t change a single moment.   Focusing on each contraction took me deep down into the experience and during the later stages the visualisation of my cervix softening and opening was intensely powerful and effective.  Adam was fully involved at all times and helped communicate my feelings to the midwife during contractions as well as somehow knowing what to say at right time.  We birthed our daughter in our front room next to the Christmas tree and in front of the open fire and Christmas stockings – four and a half hours after waking with strong contractions I was holding Danuta in my arms, crying at the beauty of our perfect baby girl who truly made this the best Christmas ever!

With the support and confidence of an amazing partner, an experienced and trusted doula and our very special birthing programme, I was never in any doubt we were doing the right thing.  I was frightened then angered by the words of my doctor, I was upset by the reaction of some friends, but I never once doubted my instincts to birth Danuta at home using hypnosis.  I can’t wait to give her a brother or sister.”

A wonderful story of a couple taking their birth preparation into their own hands for the best christmas ever!
Click to download your FREE track

Reasons why I think every couple would benefit from doing the Natal Hypnotherapy course and why it is so bloody marvellous!

Having just spent the weekend with some fab trainee practitioners and a lovely group of expectant couples it has really reminded me just how special and truly amazing the course is. I have been teaching and developing Natal Hypnotherapy for 14 years and even though I passionately believe in everything that I teach, I sometimes forget what it was like to be an expectant mother who is looking for support, reassurance and truly effective guidance which leaves them fully prepared rather than scared of giving birth. It is 15 years since I felt like that myself and at the time I did not get the kind of reassurance and positivity that I desperately needed. It was only when I discovered how to use this concept of hypnosis, followed up by my own reading and research, that I realised what I really needed was already within me – it was just hidden under this heavy blanket of cerebral information laced with tinges of fear and anxiety!.

Since then I have learnt so much about how the mind and the body works and so much about how women’s fear impacts their thoughts, emotions, their reactions and the physical functions within her body. Knowing how incredibly detrimental this fear can to the birthing process, it makes me so sad and angry that we as a society have somehow allowed so much fear to creep in, in fact in many ways we have encouraged this to happen.

And yet given the right information, the right support, really positive, effective and simple tools and techniques and ultimately the confidence to trust their body, all women and their partners can dramatically reduce this fear and anxiety. This in turn massively increases their confidence and ability to work with the body to allow it to do what it was naturally designed to do. And what is even better news is that all this can be achieved in such a short period of time. Having spent these two days with these wonderful couples, it has been a privilege to be part of their journey watching as their fears begin to dissipate, their trust begins to increase and their confidence in themselves and each other grow stronger and stronger.

And yet none of this is rocket science – all of this is done using plain, down to earth language by rekindling a connection back with the absolute basics of mammalstic birth, connecting back with the power of breathing, experiencing the sensation of deep relaxation and bit by bit, building up their confidence and belief in their innate power and ability to trust their body, accept the sensations within in their body and so give ultimately flow through the process of giving birth.

The way the Natal Hypnotherapy course has developed and progressed over the last 10 years has ensured that the teaching style appeals to all learning types, that so many of the techniques we teach are personalised so that each couple really owns and connects with the tools, from writing their own hypnotic suggestions, visualisations, affirmations, to creating their own personalised birth preparation plan. And this starts before they have even walked through the door, as each of them complete a detailed questionnaire prior to attending the course so that the practitioners are able to address their specific concerns and needs during the two days.

I feel particularly proud about the way the course helps the birth partners. I have always felt strongly that men are often thrown into the birthing room a bit like the gladiators to the lions. They are expected to be there and they are expected to know how to support their partners and yet without a true understanding of the basics of birth physiology and emotions especially anxiety and fear, it is so hard for man to support his partner effectively. The course is so geared towards helping men understand the impact that fear and anxiety can have on the birthing process, so by knowing why this happens, the signs to look out for and most importantly, effective ways to easily help her overcome them and return to a relaxed state he is far more able to provide the kind of support that will really help her. It is always such a joy to see the lightbulb moments when fathers really see and experience how effective their support is going to be on the big day. One of the best moments of the course is towards the end when mothers write up all the things they would like the fathers to do to support them and the fathers right up all the things they are going to do to support her. And what is so lovely is that they now realise they are both singing from the same hymn sheet and they both have such confidence in each other.

Unlike most other antenatal courses, the underlying message and teaching centres around the emotional map of labour – understanding this enables both the mother and father to understand the different stages, trust that it is all normal, recognise key signs and use the techniques to overcome the inevitable blips and challenges along the way.

I know it is not the done thing to blow your own trumpet, but sometimes it’s good to sit back and really appreciate what you have achieved. I know that the course, the materials and content that I’ve developed alongside the amazing practitioners who have helped teach me along the way, has helped so many thousands of couples. And yet none of this is rocket science, there is no magic formula, there is no magic key – this is just about helping couples to get rid of the fear that has been installed in us through society, media and dare I say it, the medical model of giving birth, and replacing that with a strong belief, trust and confidence in what is inherently one of the most natural events in a woman’s. It does not make any grand promises, it is grounded very much in reality as the couples come away knowing that birth can be unpredictable, birth can be tough, birth can be awesome, but also knowing that no matter what happens, no matter where their Birth takes them, they have effective tools and techniques to help them stay calm, in control of their reactions and congruency with any decisions that they need to make.

How different birth in the NHS would be if all couples had access to this kind of antenatal course.
Click here to find a Natal Hypnotherapy course near you